December 31, 2009

New Year's Resolutions


Photo by viZZual.com

Resolutions, goals, self-challenges: All of these words and similar phrases are swimming around in many of our heads and conversations this week. The new year brings a sense of freshness, newness, and the opportunity to start over. That is why many people choose January 1 as a time to implement goals for themselves and dive into a list of resolutions.

Renewal of oneself is a good thing. Re-evaluating priorities and setting goals is an exercise that we should do throughout the year, not just when the calendar turns over. Studies tell us that most of us, however, don’t make it past January maintaining success in those goals we set out to accomplish as “New Year’s resolutions.” The initial gusto and motivation quickly wane and we may be left with disappointment and a feeling of defeat. It is possible to keep those resolutions and reach those goals, however. We just have to be conscious about how we approach them and to be mindful of our motivations.

There are several strategies in setting and accomplishing goals that have been proven to ensure higher levels of success. I will outline those below, along with examples of how they may be implemented with a commonly set resolution at this time of year: getting healthy.

1. Define your goal in specific and quantifiable (or measurable) terms. What does “getting healthy” mean? What would your life or you look like if you were “healthy?” Perhaps it could mean:
- Lose weight: How much? And in what time-frame?
- Lower blood pressure (or blood sugar, or some other measure of health): To what level?
- Exercise: How often? What type?
- Eat well: What types of foods? How often?
The goals need to be measurable so that you will be able to determine if and when you have met them.

2. Break the overall goal up into smaller, realistic goals. Much like you did above in #1, the idea of “getting healthy” could entail many smaller goals. Even within those that identified above, however, you will need to identify even smaller steps. For example, if we look at losing weight:
- Set a goal weight that you would like to reach by the end of the year. Make sure this is a realistic number and one that is healthy for you.
- Now, back up from there and determine goal weights for each month between now and then. (Most health experts do not recommend setting weight loss goals for less than 1-month increments because trying to lose exorbitant amounts of weight in less time than that is not healthy.)
- Determine the steps you will need to take to reach each of those short-term goals.
As you can see, you could break your goals down further and further. Do this for all of the smaller goals you identified in #1. The purpose for doing this is to wind up with goals that are attainable. If your stated goal of “getting healthy” is all you have, that seems pretty nebulous and overwhelming. Having smaller, realistic, short-term goals allows you to see what you need to do to work towards that overall, long-term goal.

3. Gain support from loved ones and/or professionals. Talk with your healthcare provider, a nutritionist, exercise consultant, or other professionals who could help determine what goals are realistic and healthy for you. Also share your goals with family members and friends who will be supportive and help you work towards you goal. You may find someone who has a similar goal and would be willing to be a work-out buddy or lunch partner. That support is vital to success; it is not often that we succeed in reaching individual goals without some help along the way.

4. Write your goals down. Map out those short-term goals and write them down on paper. Post the steps somewhere prominent that you will see them and be able to remind yourself of what you are trying to accomplish. This list can also serve as a check-list where you can mark off where you have reached goals and remind yourself of the progress you are making.

5. Along the same lines as #3 and #4, make a public announcement of your goal. Often, we are embarrassed about the goals we have for ourselves because we don’t want other people to know what we may be struggling with. Publicly announcing your goal will make it more real, however, and also offer opportunity for support, as we noted above to be so important. For example, you could sign up for a local road race, pay the entry fee, and tell your friends about your goal in running it.

6. Reward yourself. When you attain a short-term goal, do something to reinforce your efforts and sustain your motivation. Perhaps when your blood pressure reaches your goal level, you could schedule a massage or borrow a new book from the library to enjoy. As humans, we respond most strongly to positive reinforcement; do something for yourself that rewards the hard work you have done. You will be more likely to keep it up.

7. Re-evaluate and redefine. After some time in working towards your short-term goals, look back at what you have accomplished and what you have left to do. Re-evaluate how realistic they are, redefine the short-term goals, and set new ones if appropriate. Sometimes the initial goals we set are just not effective for one reason or another; rather than giving up completely, a better solution would be to redefine them. Perhaps your initial goal was to exercise for 30 minutes, 3 days per week. After some time, you have accomplished that and realize that you would benefit from increasing the time you spend sweating every week. Maybe your new goal would be 45 minutes, 3 days per week.

8. Keep a positive attitude. Just setting your goals is a huge step towards progress and self-improvement. The task of evaluating your life and determining areas you would like to make improvement is not easy and merits a pat on the back. Success with resolutions requires taking small steps. Staying positive will ensure that you keep chipping away at your goal, despite set-backs and hurdles that are inevitable. Remember why you are doing this, what your overall goal is, and give yourself credit for making the attempt.

As the clock strikes midnight tonight, we all have a unique opportunity to shift focus and strive for something new. Think about what your resolutions might be and how they could help you to find balance in your life. Be realistic, be positive, and get started! Here’s to a simple and balanced 2010 - Happy New Year from all of us at :simple:balance:!

What goals, resolutions, or self-challenges are you setting for yourself this year?

December 29, 2009

Know Thyself


Photo by Mommyof4Ruggies

It seems like every year is the same: despite careful plotting and planning, the time surrounding the holidays is incredibly stressful. Inevitably, a tight work deadline looms as clients try to get projects wrapped up before year’s end. This year, although I made my list and checked it twice, somehow I looked up and realized that the holidays were here. I had little time left to write cards, finish making homemade gifts, bake special treats, buy gifts, wrap, pack, make arrangements with the pet sitter, ship packages to far-off loved ones, and belatedly remember a little something for the babysitter. I said things to myself like, “I have too much to do” and “there is too little time,” which only heightened my frazzled state. Before long, Christmas carols became tedious, I became as snarly as the traffic, and there was frustration and irritability in the frosty air.

So again this year I was reminded – and reminded myself – that the language we use to describe our situations to ourselves has a profound effect on our emotional experience. When I remember to school myself, I instead choose to say, “There is so much I want to do” and focus on being grateful that I had so many wonderful people in my life that I wanted to acknowledge during this special time of year. I can almost feel the tension leave my back when I make this shift.

In a broader sense as well, the words and imagery we use impact our attempts to seek balance in our lives. We are complex creatures. Language and mental pictures are essential elements of our intelligence as human beings and shape the way we think. How we think in turn impacts how we feel. Thus, knowing how to shape how we think (meta-cognition, or thinking about thinking) has the potential to allow us to dramatically shape our life experience. In other words, we need to understand how we respond to words and imagery so that we can frame our experiences for ourselves in ways that encourage us to be positive and adaptive instead of throwing our hands up in the air in frustration and defeat.

Even the word “balance” has the potential to color our feelings, and, therefore, our behavior and experiences. Balance connotes striving to find a point of equilibrium between two extremes. It implies that the “happy medium” is somewhere between those poles. That is, it fully embraces neither, but is a compromise of sorts in between them. For some people, this term and image has the potential to create tension and frustration if it seems impossible to have, for example, both satisfying work and a fulfilling family life without sacrificing some of one or both. We also often use the analogy of juggling. This image may be more palatable to some, as it implies a dynamic, skillful, and even playful attempt at having more balls than you can hold in your hands at once. For others, though, this image may portend disaster in the potential for dropping all of the balls at the same time.

As wise teachers from many traditions tell us, “know thyself.” Self-awareness is the first step toward self-mastery, no less so when it comes to our attempts to lead balanced, fulfilling lives.

What phrases, clichés, and images speak to you, and which ones turn you off or leave you cold?
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Dana, a work-at-home mom with a young son, has a lot of experience with "thriving in the juggle of life." We are excited to welcome her back today.

December 26, 2009

Vitamin D for “Dynomite”

photo by Pink Sherbet Photography

As you are enjoying this holiday season, hopefully, you get to go outside. In addition to getting some exercise, relaxation and pure enjoyment from a walk, Aundrea Tucker, our favorite holistic health counselor, is sharing a great health benefit of being outdoors --- getting your body enriched with Vitamin D.

As we get well into winter it’s vitally important that we make concerted efforts to get the Vitamin D we so desperately need. Collectively we have a Vitamin D deficiency epidemic across a variety of U.S. populations. Just take a look at these statistics:

o 32% of doctors and medical school students are vitamin-D deficient.
o 40% of the U.S. population is vitamin-D deficient.
o 42% of African American women of childbearing age are vitamin-D deficient.
o 48% of young girls (9-11 years old) are vitamin-D deficient.
o Up to 60% of all hospital patients are vitamin-D deficient.
o 76% of pregnant mothers are severely vitamin-D deficient, causing widespread vitamin-D deficiencies in their unborn children.
o Up to 80% of nursing home patients are vitamin-D deficient.

  1. Vitamin D prevents osteoporosis, depression, prostate cancer and breast cancer, and even effects diabetes and obesity. Vitamin D is perhaps the single most underrated nutrient in the world of nutrition. That’s probably because it’s free; your body makes it when sunlight touches your skin. Truth is, most people don’t know the real story on vitamin D and health.

  2. Vitamin D is produced by your skin in response to exposure to ultraviolet radiation from natural sunlight.

  3. The healing rays of natural sunlight that generate vitamin D in your skin cannot penetrate glass. So you don’t generate vitamin D when sitting in your car or home.

  4. It is nearly impossible to get adequate amounts of vitamin D from your diet. Sunlight exposure is the only reliable way to generate vitamin D in your own body.

  5. A person would have to drink 10 tall glasses of vitamin D fortified milk each day just to get minimum levels of vitamin D into their diet.

  6. The farther you live from the equator, the longer the exposure you need to the sun in order to generate vitamin D. Canada, the UK and most US states are far from the equator.

  7. People with dark skin pigmentation may need 20 to 30 times as much exposure to sunlight as fair-skinned people to generate the same amount of vitamin D. This is why prostate cancer is epidemic among black men—it is a simple but widespread sunlight deficiency.

  8. Sufficient levels of vitamin D are crucial for calcium absorption in your intestines. Without sufficient vitamin D, your body cannot absorb calcium, rendering calcium supplements useless.

  9. Chronic vitamin D deficiency cannot be reversed overnight; it takes months of vitamin D supplementation and sunlight exposure to rebuild the body’s bones and nervous system.

  10. Even weak sunscreens (SPF 8) block your body’s ability to generate vitamin D by 95%. Sunscreen products can actually cause disease by creating a critical vitamin deficiency in the body.

  11. It is impossible to generate too much vitamin D in your body from sunlight exposure: your body will self-regulate and only generate what it needs.

  12. If it hurts to press firmly on your sternum, you may be suffering from chronic vitamin D deficiency right now.

  13. Vitamin D is activated in your body by your kidneys and liver before it can be used.

  14. Having kidney disease or liver damage can greatly impair your body’s ability to activate circulating vitamin D.

  15. Even though vitamin D is one of the most powerful healing chemicals in your body, your body makes it absolutely free. No prescription required.

So how do you know if you have a deficiency? See your doctor and get your level tested through a blood panel.

How do you get Vitamin D? Hit the great outdoors, but be smart about your sunlight exposure. Time it right: If you have a fair complexion, you’ll need just 5 to 10 minutes of sunshine on your arms, legs, or back—without sunscreen (yes, it shuts down the production of D)—between 10 a.m. and 3 p.m. three days a week, Dr. Lee says. Women who have medium skin tones may need 15 to 20 minutes’ exposure, and darker-skinned women may need up to 30 minutes’ worth. And remember: Do use a sunscreen with SPF 30 or higher on your face and wear a wide-brimmed hat, especially if you’re going to be outside for any length of time.

(Information derived from “The Healing Power of Sunlight and Vitamin D: An Exclusive Interview with Dr. Michael Holick,” by Mike Adams)

December 23, 2009

Finding Your Creativity


Photo by Noodlemistress

Neurologists have long known that people who are creative often use different parts of their brains than those who are not. Even in those who are not inherently creative, studies show that when they engage in certain activities and practice certain skills, those parts of the brain become more active. I won’t get into the particulars about the anatomy and physiology of the brain here, but suffice it to say that the idea that creative people are “right-brained” has some truth to it.

The interesting thing to me, though, is that anyone can be creative. Any of us can utilize those various parts of our brains and find enjoyment in creativity. You may be asking yourself why you would want to engage other areas of your brain. “Aren’t I already using enough of my brain to try to manage all I do?” you might ask. What seems important about all of this is that when you engage yourself in a variety of activities and learn new skills, especially those that trigger use of different parts of your brain, you become better able to find balance. Your repertoire of coping strategies expands and you have more outlets for yourself.

Being creative requires you to see the world around you in a way differently than you normally do. You become more aware of the small nuances of your life and the things that you may typically take for granted or ignore. Creativity allows you to grow and develop new skills, different hobbies, and various opportunities to find well-being.

I have found that when I am overwhelmed and stressed out, one of my go-to coping strategies is finding a creative project for myself. It is not uncommon for me to have two or three going at a time that I can always fall into when I need a break away from the grind of my everyday life. I have also enjoyed learning new creative outlets, and am always looking for something that will spark my interest and give me something to look forward to.

Here are some ways to engage your own creativity (no degree in fine arts needed):

1. Pack a camera with you one day and take it everywhere you go. Snap shots of your everyday life: the people, the places, the activities. Look for interesting angles or different views. At the end of the day, look back at the photos you took and see your life from a new perspective.

2. Try out one of the popular do-it-yourself art project places. There are opportunities to paint your own pottery, paint your own picture, or make your own frame for a print you’ve been wanting to hang. Gather a few friends, take something to drink (most of these places allow this), and spend a couple of hours creating with friends.

3. Peruse the crafting books at a local bookstore. Choose one that catches your attention and try out the craft that it teaches… preferably something that you have not tried before.

4. Journal. Allow yourself to write without structure and to write about whatever may be on your mind. You could start a gratitude journal or a blog. Write about what you are passionate about that day, don’t worry about your spelling or grammar, and get your ideas out on paper (or screen).

5. Craft with your children. Something as simple as a box of crayons and some scratch paper can trigger amazing creativity in our children. Get down on their level, pick up some colors yourself, watch them, and emulate.

6. Write a letter. The art of letter-writing is disappearing in this age of email and electronic communication. While I don’t admonish the latter, I do still appreciate and enjoy the time and art in writing a letter. Think about someone who you have not communicated with recently, pick up some nice stationary and an ink pen, and write to them.

7. Play some music. For those of you who have talent with an instrument, this could entail you pulling out your old guitar and strumming on it. For those of us without such talent, it could mean that we turn on Pandora. Or the radio. Or an old record or CD. Having music in our lives automatically triggers those creative parts of our brain, whether playing or listening.

8. Take a walk. Or go for a hike, practice yoga, rock climb, or do anything else that stretches you physically. Try a new sport or exercise, use different muscles, and become more physically creative.

9. Wear a new outfit. Borrow something from a friend or buy something inexpensive. Choose a piece that is different from your normal wardrobe, mix and match varying pieces, with an goal of being creative. If you are really crafty, try making yourself something by engaging some sewing, knitting, or other skills.

10. Make something good to eat. Remember a favorite dish at a restaurant? Try to recreate it at home. Or come up with something completely innovative – choose some of your favorite ingredients and attempt a culinary masterpiece. Enjoy.

Sometimes if we don’t have a particular talent or skill, we assume that we cannot be creative. It is important, however, to find our own creativity and utilize it. Not only will it give you an outlet and something to go to for relaxation, but it will also expand your horizons and enhance your perspective on life. Seeing things from a creative viewpoint can be restorative and balancing.

What are your creativities? How do you try to implement them into your life?

December 19, 2009

Flexibility


Photo by tamelyn

I had every intention of writing this post several days ago. The task of doing so was even on my to-do list and calendar, and so I was sure I would get it accomplished with plenty of time to spare. However, at 11:00pm last night when I still did not have it done, my eyelids were drooping, and I couldn’t think straight, I made the choice to get some sleep rather than finish that which should have been done days ago.

Life happens – quickly and unexpectedly, sometimes – especially during this season of the holidays. Of course, I should have predicted my well-laid plans may go out the window, but I held on to optimism (like I typically do) and assumed that I would tick things off my list in a fashionable order. But when my husband had to go out of town for an unplanned business trip, my job required some extra time unexpectedly, my daughter decided that she could not function without being held by me, and my dogs ran through a yard full of mud and tracked it all in on my newly cleaned carpets (several days before out-of-town guests arrive, of course!), I felt defeated. Along with writing this post, my to-do list also had the usual holiday myriad of baking, gift making, and laundry. I realistically could not do it all. Without necessarily choosing to, I have been duly reminded about flexibility.

Work-life balance research has shown time and time again that one of the most important factors that increase a person’s feeling of balance is that of perceived flexibility. The more you believe that you have flexibility in one (or all) of your roles, the more likely you are to believe you are able to balance them. And therefore, you will experience less conflict between your competing roles.

Flexibility = harmony.

The finding certainly makes logical sense. While this research has looked at the flexibility of the particular roles, I am also curious about what role flexibility of the individual plays.
One of my default characteristics is adherence to routines. Especially when I am trying to balance my life and “thrive in the juggle of life,” I find it paramount to have a schedule and a routine that I can count on. Most times, when I try to fly by the seat of my pants, things crumble into a disaster. Especially when it comes to children. But I have also learned that being flexible within that routine can be vital to finding balance too.

Too much rigidity is bad for the soul. While my initial reaction yesterday afternoon was to scream and pull my hair out, instead, I found myself gritting my teeth, taking a deep breath, and changing things up a bit. For example, while I really needed my daughter to play by herself while I cleaned up the dishes, I succumbed to her requests and enjoyed some time just holding her. While this may have slowed me down and prevented me from doing all I wanted, it also gave me the opportunity to nourish something important that I had left off my list that day.

I am certainly a work-in-progress with this whole flexibility thing. There is a fine line for me between having a flexible routine and all falling into mass chaos. Maybe that is a bit extreme, but it’s how I feel when things start to go out of plan. I am learning, though, that the chaos often offers the opportunity for some of the sweetest moments of my life.

Consider your approach to flexibility in your life. Do you have it? Sometimes it takes practice to be more comfortable with changing up a routine and being more flexible. Here are some ideas for ways to practice increasing your personal flexibility in order to balance your life roles:

1. Pick one night of the week and don’t make any dinner plans ahead of time. Don’t pick up take-out or go to the grocery store, but rather scramble around your house to find something to eat when you get home. (Doing this will teach you to have things around that you can fall back on when needed… especially on those days that you don’t plan an “unplanned dinner.”)

2. Take a different route to or from work (or school, the store, etc.). We often go into “auto-pilot” when engaged in a typical routine – forcing yourself out of that will open your eyes to new things in your surroundings. (It will also teach you other traveling routes so that when the need presents itself, you are prepared with a Plan B.)

3. Give yourself 5 extra minutes. For any task that you have to accomplish, plan an extra 5 minutes for it. Traveling, doing chores, drafting emails… anything. Having more time will automatically give you flexibility to change things up a bit if you need (or want) to.

4. Take a day trip away from home without a plan. Take a map or GPS, some snacks and water, and hit the road. Decide where to go as you are going – see where you end up and what you experience. This may sound a bit scary with kids, but some of the best times with children are spent spontaneously. And if you are really brave, do this on a day that you had other plans – ditch them and go!

5. Change up your wardrobe. Dig deep into your closet to pull out the things you never wear, trade clothes with a friend, and mix and match. I sometimes get into a clothing rut where I wear the same things, week in and week out. Pulling some different things together without spending extra money is a fun way to change it up and increase flexibility in your appearance.

Let us know your ideas on flexibility and any tips you have found to be helpful in generating more of it for yourself. For me, I will take a deep breath, press “publish” on this post, and get back to scrubbing mud out of the carpet. Happy flexible holidays!

December 15, 2009

Why Wednesday Is My New Favorite Day of the Week

photo by SashaW

“Ultimately you come to the state where you do nothing and accomplish everything” ~Deepak Chopra

Many of us are extremely busy and focused on what we need to do next. In some way, our existence on this planet is about non-stop doing versus being. Let me explain, we are so busy with everything we need to do every day that we forget to notice that even just being in this world feels quite good. Deepak Chopra wrote a book, The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success, that outlines seven laws (one for each day of the week) that help us remember why being is important and how we can achieve what we want by going with the flow of life versus against it. For example, the spiritual day for Monday is the law of “Giving and receiving.” It reminds us about the importance of having the circulation of giving and receiving in our lives. The law of the day on Thursday is about our intentions and desires. It reminds us to be aware of our deepest desires and to take steps (even small ones) towards them.

We have a guest today, Sue Knight, Ph.D., who pays attention to these laws every day of her life. She wants to share with you information on her favorite law of the day. Thank you, Sue!

Ever since I decided to focus on one of The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success each day of the week, I love Wednesdays. The Law of Least Effort, the fourth Law, is my favorite. It’s based on the idea that the total combined wisdom of the Universe or Nature is operating at all times, and the less I try to intervene or even fight my way through, the more harmonious the outcomes will be. Sure, I do have a piece of the Universe’s divine wisdom inside myself, but sometimes it’s way inside there, and I’m not accessing it effectively. The Law of Least Effort reminds me that a good default option to always consider is letting nature take its course. Here’s how that law has made Wednesday the BEST for me:

Each morning when I wake up, I review the spiritual law of the day before I start meditating, starting with the first law on Sunday. I think about the concept behind the law and the three guideline tips for applying the law that are included in Chopra’s book. On Wednesdays, I’m thinking about the tremendous release offered by the idea that the least effort may be the best effort in any given situation. And I’m remembering the three guideline tips I can use to make it happen for me:
  • Accept people, events, and circumstances as they are. Minimize my attempts to control the world.
  • Be responsible by using my “ability” to “respond” in the moment when that is right. Stop blaming myself or anyone else for the way things are; just go forward with “now.”
  • Avoid defensiveness. It’s amazing how much time is saved by simply not defending my position!

As I go about my Wednesday, the Law of Least Effort is playing in the background of my mind and can be brought to the forefront at any time. It’s especially useful when I want to stop racing thoughts, when I’m in an awkward social situation, when I’m struggling with a work issue, or when I’m feeling like I have too much to do with too little time. A simple reflection on the harmony that exists in the vastness of the universe is enough to take the pressure off me to provide the “fix.” When I do that, I start relaxing in the idea that I’m just a little piece in a gigantic puzzle, and the more I can keep my edges soft, the better for the whole to fit together. Once I’m thinking about the gigantic puzzle and I’m in Law of Least Effort mode, I’m better able to respond to what other puzzle pieces are presenting and align myself so everything goes together better.

I used to think of Wednesday as “Hump Day” – I was all about getting closer to the weekend, and Wednesday represented getting halfway there. Now with my new perspective, I’m savoring the moments with their constant opportunities to give least effort on Wednesday – and it’s much more enjoyable! Plus things just seem to turn out better without my resistance. Of course, use of the Law of Least Effort isn’t limited to Wednesday; over time it’s becoming a more typical response option for me 24-7.

All of the spiritual laws have added to my “life-balancing repertoire” over the last year since I started using them, and each day is better now that there’s an underlying law to consider whenever I’d like. Just one more example: Sunday is the Law of Pure Potentiality, which contains reminders of the infinite possibilities contained within every single moment. The three guideline tips are to: 1) meditate in a way that frees my mind from my day-to-day surroundings, thoughts and feelings, 2) spend time outside marveling at the way nature unfolds, and 3) avoid judging anyone or anything, since there is obviously a much larger sense to everything than I am aware of.

Please share with us if there is anything that helps you to get a perspective on things when life seems to be spinning around with lots of responsibilities.

December 11, 2009

Take a (Holiday) Hike

Photo by mimo

‘Tis the season to overeat…and I am guilty. How can anyone resist all of the holiday treats, large meals, and plethora of desserts? I am doing good to hold it down to a moderate amount of gluttony.

My typical way of coping with my love of food is exercise. While I certainly don’t exercise on the regiment that I should, over the years I have learned to mix some exercise or physical activity in during times when eating is the theme of the season.

A recent post by Stacey lists starting new family traditions as a way to simplify your holiday season. There is no reason why new family traditions have to be centered around a coffee table full of fudge and peanut brittle. At one of our family gatherings, we have started the tradition of having a basketball game. All are invited to play, and it is a great way to work off some turkey and dressing.

For those of you who go back to your hometown for the holidays, walk around the neighborhood, showing your kids where you grew up playing, or walk to old friends’ and neighbors’ homes to give them holiday well-wishes. For those of you who enjoy the outdoors, pack up the leftovers, bundle up, and take the family for a hike in the woods. If the weather is too inclement, there are other options like indoor community centers, or I hear that the Nintendo Wii Fit is great fun for the entire family.

Look for a new holiday tradition that can burn some calories. You’ll feel better about yourself and you will not have so much ground to make up after the New Year. There will be some scrooges that do not want to participate, but, if you will lead the charge, others will join in. What calorie burning activities do you enjoy with your family during the holidays?

Thank you, David, for your great ideas on keeping balance through the holidays! We hope you all have enjoyed Holiday Week at :simple:balance:, and we look forward to sharing more on finding life balance with you next week. Happy weekend!

December 10, 2009

R-E-L-A-X This Holiday Season














Photo by littlemoresunshine

Aundrea is back to give her perspective, as a certified holistic health counselor, on how to find some relaxation during such a busy time of year...

Doesn’t it seem like the race gun is fired right after your Thanksgiving meal? You can almost hear “And they’re off!” as the flurry of activities and events begin to fill our days and calendars. Well, we should be putting some other to-do’s in our calendars as well … reminders to R-E-L-A-X …

Here are some tips to do just that:

:: Visualize your ideal holiday season as balanced and harmonious. Don’t be afraid to re-evaluate family traditions and start some new ones.

:: Think about what relaxation means to you. Whether it means taking a bath, going to the gym or taking a yoga class, find ways that help you recharge your batteries so you are not constantly on the go.

:: Schedule down time. Enjoy time alone by listening to music or reading a book. Turn off your phone, if you can, so you are not distracted.

:: Recognize when you’re experiencing too much stress. Decrease your stress levels by deep breathing or visualizing a place you’d like to be.

:: Keep focused on your relaxation goals. Remind yourself why it’s important to stay relaxed and balanced.

Staying relaxed is not only important around the holidays, but year-round. When you are living in harmony with your own body you’ll experience better health and more happiness – and so will your loved ones! Happy holidays!

December 9, 2009

Are You Present for Your Present?

photo by fesoi

"When we can accept all of life's contradictions, when we can comfortably flow between the banks of pleasure and pain, experiencing them both while getting stuck in neither, then we are free" ~Deepak Chopra

Holiday time is filled with rushing, going from one store to the next, cooking, eating, signing holiday cards, visiting, wrapping gifts, opening gifts, etc. Especially at this time of the year we may feel that “time is slipping,” “there is not enough time in the day” and if only we could have two extra hours, we would finish everything we want to finish. Amongst all the chaos, I find that reconnecting with myself helps me feel more balanced and definitely adds to the joy of holidays.

Many of us have heard about the importance of being present and being in the “now.” What exactly does it mean? To me, it means to not leave your life by being entirely lost in what happened or didn’t happen (past) or what I need to do tomorrow, next week (future). Instead or in addition to past and future, I invite you to focus on the PRESENT---what can be more real? The past is gone, the future may never happen, so enjoy the ride (even if it’s crazy) of the present.

You may think, “it sounds good, but how do I stay focused on now?” Our minds tend to wonder off either to the past or the future, so Dr. David Simon, co-founder of the Chopra Center, believes that we need to focus on our heart. He believes that instead of trying to get to a place (Present), we need to observe and experience it. Here are few suggestions that work for me:

1. Pay attention. Throughout your day pay attention to when your mind wonders off and gets stuck and bring yourself back to what you are doing now. You will be able to notice why you do it: are you bored? Are you upset? Are you overwhelmed? You will get a lot more clarity on why your mind is restless.
2. Feel your body. The mind may tend to wonder off, but the body is in the present, so by paying attention to the feelings inside of you, you can better reconnect with the moment. How does it feel when someone gives you a gift? How does it feel to give a gift?
3. Listen to others. Being an active listener is not always easy and definitely keeps your attention in the present. During holidays, you may have a great opportunity to practice this valuable skill. Cherish your relationships with close ones by listening.
4. Reconnect through nature. Nature has a beautiful power to pull us back to the present. I went for a walk this morning and couldn’t but pay attention to the beautiful early morning sky, the smell of fireplaces in the air, the trees (at night they are beautifully lit up with all the lights). Notice the beauty around you by connecting to different elements: walking on Earth, smelling the Air, walking by the Water or Ice sculptures, gaze at the Fire in the fireplace, appreciate the vastness of the open Space. Sometimes, you even don’t have to be outside, you may just look out the window an notice the moon or sun shining at you.
5. Meditation helps bring our awareness to the present moment. The benefits of regular practice would help you experience more peace and desire to stay in now.

Wherever you are, whatever you do, experience this holiday time by being Present for everything: highs and lows, joys and sorrows, laughter and tears… Enjoy the ride!

December 7, 2009

Simplifying the Holidays

Welcome to Holiday Week at :simple:balance:! This time of year can pose a lot of challenges to finding balance; so we thought it would be helpful to tackle some of them head-on and early. The posts this week will be dedicated to finding balance during the holiday season… with a focus on simplicity, celebration, and priority placed on the things that are most important. We are looking forward to contributions from some of our guest writers this week, and as always, we welcome your suggestions and feedback, as well. So grab a cup of hot cocoa, turn on some holiday music, and join us throughout the week at :simple:balance: to get in the spirit simply.

To start off Holiday Week, we will be looking at some tips to scale down your activities, find enjoyment in the things you value, and relax during the hustle and bustle. There is no denying that this time of year can create pressure, throw all schedules out the window, and feel like a hurried celebration rather than a genuine one. The following are ten ideas for simplifying things, as well as examples of how I have been or will be implementing them.

1. Sit down with your family, your friends, or by yourself, and write out the top three activities you would like to participate in this holiday season. This is better done earlier rather than later because the rest of your planning will revolve around these three things. There will always be multiple parties, get-togethers, shopping trips, and other activities to choose from that will quickly fill up your calendar. To make sure you maintain your priorities and spend your limited time and energy where you want, decide ahead of time what is most important. [For me: (1) be at home Christmas Eve and Christmas morning, (2) spend an evening driving around town to see local holiday lights, (3) host a small get-together for close friends.]
2. Start planning your gift-giving early… really, really early. Maybe this means being on the look-out for gifts at sales you see throughout the year, or maybe it means talking with your loved ones about how gifts will be exchanged well before you see them at Thanksgiving. Plan your budget for gift-giving so you can save appropriately throughout the year. And stick with that budget when the time comes. (If you haven’t done that already, be realistic now with what you have to spend or give.) Write out a list of the people you will be giving to with notes about what they like or ideas for things you could give them. As you get a gift for them, write it on the list, go ahead and wrap it (if you’re really motivated!), and cross the person off your list. [For me: I maintain my list throughout the year, and as ideas come to me or I pick things up, I log it on my list so I don’t forget. When holiday time arrives, I feel more organized and like I am a step ahead.]
3. Consider handmade gifts for your loved ones. I have learned that the old adage, “it’s the thought that counts” is so, so true. I would much rather receive something handmade especially for me than some expensive store-bought thing. When someone takes the time and energy to make me something, I truly feel loved. Use your talents or learn a new hobby to make some gifts for your loved ones. Spend relaxing time at home on these gifts rather than hurried time in traffic or in a mall searching for the “perfect” gift. [For me: I am hand-making most of my gifts this year… from spiced nuts to kids’ music CDs to bath goodies. All simple, but love-filled.]
4. If you don’t have the time or the energy to hand-make your gifts, consider a charitable donation. We recently posted about a great organization you can consider, as well as more information about charitable giving. Check it out! [For me: My family is making a donation to a charity special to us in honor of our loved ones. We will write a letter to them describing what we have done and how the donation will be used; they will get that letter as their gift to unwrap. I am also encouraging my loved ones to do the same!]
5. Cook in bulk! When things are hectic, who has time to make a healthy meal at the end of a busy day? Running through a fast-food drive-through is not a great option, though, so make it realistic that you could eat something wholesome. Starting before the holiday season, double or triple the recipes you normally make, and freeze the extra in meal-size portions. Once the busy season hits, you will have some meals ready-made to thaw and enjoy. [For me: I am making a big pot of vegetable soup tonight… two-thirds of which will go into the freezer for use over the next few weeks. Yum…]
6. If you make holiday treats, use the same philosophy as in #5 above. To avoid late-night cookie factories in your kitchen, make dough or finished treats ahead of time, freeze them, and then thaw when you are ready to enjoy or share. [For me: I have some pumpkin puree frozen from last month that will soon be used in a yummy pumpkin bread recipe that is a tradition in my family.]
7. Find time for the things that nourish and fulfill you at other times of the year. Exercise, meditation, downtime with a loved one, and hobbies are easily neglected when the holidays are in full-swing. Schedule these activities for yourself and work the holiday business around them. In order to accomplish and enjoy all you want, you have to be nourished. [For me: This one is a poignant reminder! I’ve not been good about keeping my exercise routine lately, so this week is devoted to re-engaging in those early morning work-outs.]
8. Get enough rest and sleep! Parties and other late-night events may interfere with a normal sleep schedule, but that doesn’t mean that you can’t get enough rest overall. Keep a regular sleep routine, as you are able, and pay attention to what your body is telling you. You won’t be able to enjoy the holidays if you can’t keep your eyes open! [For me: Another good reminder! I spent last week finishing a handmade gift that had to be delivered this weekend, so that meant a couple of late nights. I am getting back on schedule, and can already tell that my body is thanking me.]
9. Dress festively. This may sound silly, but it truly is a simple way to celebrate the holidays without much time or energy. Go through your closet or drawers and pick out some clothes that make you feel good about yourself and bring our your holiday spirit. Wear them whenever you need some holiday cheer. [For me: I got a pedicure this weekend and am now sporting red, sparkly toes!]
10. Create a holiday tradition for yourself and/or your family. Think back to things that you did with your family – do any of those hold value for you now? Would you like to repeat them with your family this year? Or consider something new that you can create as a time-honored tradition and symbol of the season for your family. Some examples include: making an ornament each year for your Christmas tree, singing holiday songs around the fire, baking holiday goodies and sharing with residents at a local nursing home, collecting gifts for a child in need, building a family gingerbread house, or volunteering at a local soup kitchen or food pantry. [For me: Cutting down a Christmas tree at a local tree farm, decorating it to the sounds of holiday music, while sharing a cup of hot cocoa or tea with my family.]

Happy holidays! What ideas or suggestions do you have for keeping them simple and joyous?


(Photos by ~*~...nicole...~*~, tamaskoszo, The Gifted Photographer)

December 4, 2009

Face Lotion Recipe

photo by rafaellmagalhaes

Winter is typically a very dry time of the year. Many of us forget
to moisturize our skin, which leads to rashes, cracks and many other skin problems. Do not forget that skin is our largest organ, so treat it with care and love. Many commercial lotions contain harmful ingredients. So, below is a recipe for a safe lotion. Not only your skin will be grateful, but you may even save a few dollars.


Ingredients:
  • 1 ounce of cocoa butter
  • 2 ounces almond oil

  • 3 to 4 drops of rose or geranium oil

Place the cocoa butter and almond oil together in a small pan. Heat until the butter melts. Add essential oils and allow to cool. Enjoy!

Please share any other tips to keep your skin healthy during this time of the year.

December 1, 2009

Blog with Heart


Photo by ChildrensWishList

Simplifying my holiday plans is a hallmark step for me this year in achieving balance. Being overwhelmed with party plans, food menus, and gift shopping have, in the past, cast a shadow over the more meaningful reasons for the season. When I am running from store to store, digging deep in my pockets for uninspired or less-than-thoughtful gifts, and trying to make everyone happy, I forget why I am even celebrating. It all winds up as one big, stressful, fast-paced event that is over before I even had the chance to enjoy it. Whatever your tradition, this time of year offers the opportunity to sit back, reflect, and enjoy time with loved ones.

I don’t need a single material thing. I have a comfortable home, all of my necessities, and far more “extravagancies” than I really need. So when people have asked me what I want for Christmas this year, my genuine response is: NOTHING. I really do not want you to spend your hard-earned money on me; I do not want to have to find a place for some knick-knack that I don’t have space for; and I do not want to contribute to making the holidays about STUFF. Rather, I would appreciate your time, a visit, or just your thoughts.

My loved ones, probably like yours, aren’t going for it. They say things like, “Well, I’m going to buy you something anyway, so you better just give me a list.” Unfortunately, we tend to feel like we haven’t done enough if we haven’t gotten someone a gift for a special occasion. If they can’t or won’t do something homemade, another option is a charitable donation. (If you are one of my loved ones who cannot go without buying a gift, please, please, please continue reading!)

Some people in the blogging community have grouped together to provide a resource for all of those gift-determined folks who need an outlet for their cash. The “Blog with Heart Challenge” is being hosted by Mary Jaksch of Goodlife ZEN and Arvind Devalia of Make It Happen and starts today, December 1, 2009. The Challenge is joining forces with Kiva, a highly respected micro-lending non-profit organization, to challenge bloggers and readers to alleviate poverty throughout the world. Sounds like a pretty daunting task – much harder than just running to Target to pick up a sweater – but stay with me to see how easy and effective it is... and how you could get involved.

Kiva is the world’s first person-to-person micro-lending website. Its stated mission is to “connect people through lending for the sake of alleviating poverty.” You may have heard of the concept or the organization through testimonies by people like Oprah Winfrey or Bill Clinton or in FORTUNE magazine or on the Today Show. In fact, Muhammad Yunus founded his Grameen bank in 1976 as a resource for micro-loans to the poor; thirty years later, in 2006, he won the Nobel Peace Prize for his work in eradicating poverty through his organization. You can learn more details about micro-lending at Kiva’s website, as well as information about the specifics of how the organization works. The basic idea is this: you lend a small amount of money (as little as $25) to a low-income entrepreneur in a developing country. They then use that money to start a business that they can grow and use to support their family and community. Most low-income entrepreneurs do not have access to traditional bank loans, and while they may only need a few dollars to get started, they are not able to build a business that would eventually sustain them financially… thus ending their struggle with poverty. Your loan would allow them to do that.

Kiva provides a forum for you to connect directly with low-income entrepreneurs. You can read about them, their business goals, and the progress they are making toward supporting themselves and their families. You can choose an individual and make a loan directly to them. You may have the opportunity to receive email updates about how that person is doing with their business and your loan, and stay connected to their progress. The Blog with Heart Challenge is one opportunity to get involved alongside other :simple:balance:rs. It is (no pun intended) simple:

1. Sign up and register with Kiva here.
2. Go to the :simple:balance: Lending Team and click the “Join Now” button.
3. Click on “LEND” in the navigation bar, and then choose someone that you would like to make a loan to. Browse the possibilities, read about people’s business goals and dreams, and choose someone (or multiple people) that you would like to help.
4. Boost the :simple:balance: team! On the “My Basket” page, in the upper right hand section, type :simple:balance: blog in the box.
5. Continue with the payment process.
6. Enjoy the feeling of helping someone to support themselves, their family, and their community. You have just taken a step towards ending world poverty.
7. After the loan you made is repaid, you can lend that same money to another low-income entrepreneur. Keep on enjoying the process!

Consider charitable gifts for the holidays this year. Inform your loved ones that you would prefer the simple route this year: a donation to someone who needs it would be much appreciated. You may have a favorite organization that you contribute to already – consider upping your donation this year in honor of your loved ones. If you want them to have something to open on the big day, write up a description of the organization, their mission and goals, and how your donation, in their honor, will help – wrap it up and present it to the people you love. Maybe you will even motivate someone else to do the same! If you are interested in taking a step toward eradicating world poverty, please check into the “Blog with Heart Challenge” and Kiva. It is amazing how fewer wrapped boxes and less money spent on gadgets can alleviate stress and foster a sense of balance… and appreciation for the holidays.

What do you think about charitable giving? Are you going to give the “Blog with Heart Challenge” a try this year? What other suggestions and ideas do you have?

November 28, 2009

Five Key Shopping Tips

Photo by Jeff Keen

We hope that all of you had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Aundrea, the certified holistic health counselor, is back with us to share some wonderful shopping tips. Enjoy!

With limited time in the day and so many things to keep up with, do you ever find yourself at the grocery store and have no idea what you need to buy? You can’t remember what’s at home AND you keep meaning to buy healthier foods to have on hand, but you just haven’t gotten educated enough to really start? Baby steps … baby steps …

Start (or re-start!) your habit of writing items down as you discover you need them. This will become your grocery list. My grandmother always shopped by a list and rarely bought things not on that list. Incidentally, my grandparents watched their money and were therefore able to grow (and re-grow!) their money over the years. I need to keep this in mind myself.

For those of us who need to get on track, here are some baby steps – 5 little tips - to keep top of mind as you focus on being prepared to shop, eat healthier, and mind your budget. You may even want to print these tips and keep them in your purse or wallet.

1. Don’t shop when you’re hungry!

2. Always bring a list and stick to it as much as possible.

3. Avoid foods that contain the following additives:

Sodium Nitrite: causes cancer, found in processed meats like hot dogs, bacon, and
sausage. Used to make meats appear red (a color fixer chemical).

Hydrogenated Oils, or Trans Fats: causes heart disease, nutritional deficiencies,
general deterioration of cellular health, and much more. Found in cookies, crackers,
margarine and many "manufactured" foods. Used to make oils stay in the food,
extending shelf life. Sometimes also called "plastic fat."

Excitotoxins: aspartame, monosodium glutamate and others. These neurotoxic
chemical additives directly harm nerve cells, over-exciting them to the point of cell
death, according to Dr. Russell Blaylock. They're found in diet soda, canned soup,
salad dressing, breakfast sausage and even many manufactured vegetarian foods.
They're used to add flavor to over-processed, boring foods that have had the life
cooked out of them.

o Note: MSG can be hidden under the following covert names:
autolyzed, hyrdrolyzed, yeast estract, tortula yeast.

High Frutose Corn Syrup: cheap form of sugar that metabolizes in the liver

4. When buying processed flour products, like bread or wraps, look for the word “whole” at the
beginning of the ingredient list.

5. Look for ingredients with names you recognize, and are short in length. (For example, the ingredient list for peanut butter should read “peanuts, salt”.)

November 24, 2009

Spending Time With Your Family

photo by CarbonNYC

“Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving.” ~ Kahlil Gibran



I am running to Costco, cleaning the house and finalizing the menu for Thanksgiving. Within a few hours our 1,000 square foot condo will be filled with 10 people and 2 dogs. Although I am excited to see everyone, I know (from the past experience) that emotions can run high during holidays. So, there are few reminders that I developed for myself that will help me enjoy this time of the year:



  • Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the preparation and details that we forget what Thanksgiving is about. To me, it is about gratitude and appreciation towards what you have and most importantly who you have in your life. As much as possible, keep the gratitude in perspective.

  • Accept the fact that every family has its highs and lows. We often take our families for granted and wish for something or someone different. “If only my mom could”… does it sound familiar? I finally came to realization that my family members are just the way they are. I can hope for things to be different, but the best thing I can do is to accept them as they are. If I have a burning desire to improve someone, I focus on myself. Interestingly, I noticed that improving myself not only makes me feel better, but definitely produces some positive curiosity among my family members.

  • Let go of perfectionism during holidays. We all know that life is not perfect. It is so much easier if you let go off the desire to make everything perfect and everyone happy. So, I realize that I cannot clean and organize everything, I cannot cook all the dishes I would like to prepare and that someone may get upset about something. But overall, I think we will still have a good time.

  • Share responsibilities. Some of us just have a hard time delegating. I learned that it is much easier and it makes other people happier to help out.

  • Everyone is allowed to have their own opinion. Sometimes, there may be a debate and we just really want for people to see things/issues just like we see them. But how boring the world would be if everyone thought like we did? Accept the multitude of perspectives and release the need to be right. If you strongly disagree with something before you voice your disagreement, take a pause and think “That’s interesting… I have never thought about it that way. It is a different way of viewing this issue.”

  • The next few days will go by so fast. If you start feeling overwhelmed, find a quiet place for a few minutes of reflection. If no rooms are available (happens quite often in my house), the bathroom works great too.


Have a wonderful Thanks Giving!

November 20, 2009

Pumpkin Muffins

photo by muffet
This time of the year is filled with some festive food. Anything we can do to keep it a little healtier and still tasty will help us with our sense of balance. Here is a wonderful recipe for your weekend or family get together.
Ingredients (Makes 12 muffins)
  • 2 cups of whole wheat pastry flour or spelt flour
  • 1/2 cup turbinado sugar (you can find it at Trader Joes or other stores)
  • 1 teaspoon cinnamon
  • 1 teaspoon nutmeg
  • 2 teaspoons baking powder
  • 1/2 teaspoons baking soda
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 1/2 slides almonds and/or walnuts
  • 1/2 cup raising or dried cranberries
  • 1 cup low-fat vanilla soymilk, rice milk or regular milk
  • 1 tablespoon vegetable oil
  • 1/2 maple syrup
  • 3/4 cup pumkin puree
  • one diced apple (optional)

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees. Spray a muffin pay with the oil and set aside. In a bowl, stir together with a wire whisk the flour, sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, baking powder, baking soda, salt, almonds, and raisins. In a separate, larger bowl, combine the milk, oil, maple syrup and pumkin puree. Add the dry ingredients to the wet ingredients and combine gently. Scoop into the muffin pan and bake for 20-25 minutes or until golden brown. An inserted toothpick should come out clean. ENJOY!

Try this recipe and let us know how you like it.

November 17, 2009

Stress in America


Photo by Raychel Mendez

At one time or another, we all talk about stress and feeling the burden of our many responsibilities, and we often wonder how we can best cope with all we have on our plates. The juggle involved in being both a career-oriented and family-oriented person at the same time can take a toll on our well-being if we aren’t careful. Our goal should be to find fulfillment in these activities, not to feel overwhelmed.

We at :simple:balance: aren’t the only ones who explore these topics and ask questions about how to best handle stress. The American Psychological Association (APA) recently conducted a survey entitled “Stress in America.” Findings from this study have been cited in the popular press, academic journals, and people’s front porches. Given the scope of the survey and the applicability of its findings, we thought it only prudent to share some thoughts on it here.

First, the results. Here are the key findings, as identified by the APA:

1. Stress is on the rise and women bear the brunt. Almost half of the respondents indicated that their stress levels had risen in the past year, and about 30% rated them as “extreme.” Nearly half of the people who responded to the survey say that they are not sure they are doing enough or don’t believe they are doing enough to manage their stress. Women reported higher levels of stress than men, had more physical and emotional symptoms of stress, and were likely to report more various stressors.
2. Stress impacts physical and psychological health. Respondents identified several medical and emotional concerns that are likely increased or worsened with higher levels of stress: heart disease, depression, cancer, obesity, insomnia, sexual dysfunction, gastrointestinal problems, anxiety, anger, and fatigue, to name a few.
3. Money and the economy are top stressors. About 80% of Americans identified one of these two factors as being their most significant life stressor. Work, health problems affecting family, family responsibilities, housing costs, relationships, personal health concerns, job stability, and personal safety rounded out the list.
4. Stress affects how people cope. As compared to a survey conducted in 2007, Americans are now using healthy coping strategies less frequently. Things like exercise were cited less than more sedentary activities such as listening to music. Other unhealthy strategies such as drinking, smoking, or gambling were reported by some to be believed to be effective for managing stress. Such results suggest that while people report they are handling their stress appropriately, they would benefit from additional, healthier coping strategies.

Do you see yourself in any of these results? Given that these findings are based on a survey of the general American population, I’m guessing we can all find something from our own lives in what is described above. After all, haven’t you recently had a discussion with your neighbor, co-worker, or friend about the instability in the economy, daily stressors, or even the physical or emotional side effects of stress? I think most of us have these topics on our minds fairly regularly. So now the question is: What can we do to improve our own stress levels and ur coping abilities?

The APA gives several suggestions and tips on managing stress. They suggest that coping with stress is a learned behavior, and therefore something that takes a conscious effort and practice. Here is what they have to say:

- Understand how you experience stress. Everyone experiences stress differently. How do you know when you are stressed? How are your thoughts or behaviors different from times when you do not feel stressed?
- Identify your sources of stress. What events or situations trigger stressful feelings? Are they related to your children, family, health, financial decisions, work, relationships or something else?
- Learn your own stress signals. People experience stress in different ways. You may have a hard time concentrating or making decisions, feel angry, irritable or out of control, or experience headaches, muscle tension or a lack of energy. Gauge your stress signals.
- Recognize how you deal with stress. Determine if you are using unhealthy behaviors (such as smoking, drinking alcohol and over/under eating) to cope. Is this a routine behavior, or is it specific to certain events or situations? Do you make unhealthy choices as a result of feeling rushed and overwhelmed?
- Find healthy ways to manage stress. Consider healthy, stress-reducing activities such as meditation, exercising or talking things out with friends or family. Keep in mind that unhealthy behaviors develop over time and can be difficult to change. Don't take on too much at once. Focus on changing only one behavior at a time.
- Take care of yourself. Eat right, get enough sleep, drink plenty of water and engage in regular physical activity. Ensure you have a healthy mind and body through activities like yoga, taking a short walk, going to the gym or playing sports that will enhance both your physical and mental health. Take regular vacations or other breaks from work. No matter how hectic life gets, make time for yourself — even if it's just simple things like reading a good book or listening to your favorite music.
- Reach out for support. Accepting help from supportive friends and family can improve your ability to manage stress. If you continue to feel overwhelmed by stress, you may want to talk to a psychologist, who can help you better manage stress and change unhealthy behaviors.

We will continue to explore these tips in future posts, but want to get you thinking about them now. The take-home message from the APA survey seems to be twofold: (1) You are not alone in your experience of a stressful life. The “Stress in America” findings indicate that higher levels of stress and more difficulty managing imbalance is a common experience for most Americans today. Sometimes knowing that we are not the only ones struggling is a relief. (2) There is room for improvement. While we may think, in our society, that we are coping well with our stressors, this survey suggests that we can do much better. Additional methods of balancing in the juggle are available and proven to be effective, so start thinking about your own life and ways you can start to implement the tips given above.

We would love to hear your feedback. What do you think about the “Stress in America” survey? Where do you see yourself?

November 14, 2009

Finding Time to Sit Down


photo by Rennett Stowe

“Meditation is not a way of making your mind quiet. It’s a way of entering into the quiet that’s already there—buried under the 50,000 thoughts the average person thinks every day.” Deepak Chopra, M.D.

As Dana described in our earlier post this week, very often we find ourselves out of balance and typically we pick up on the signs and realize that we need to get ourselves back on track. Different techniques and tools work for different people: some of us like to go get a massage, others need to spend a relaxing day in nature or go to the movies with friends. Although I enjoy all of the above, the tool that helps me relax and unwind on daily basis is meditation. Many people express an interest in trying meditation. However, if you have never done meditation or read about it, it may seem a little unapproachable. I wanted to devote this time to introducing you to meditation and its benefits.
  • Definition. There are so many definitions of meditation. Here is my version: it is a mental discipline that allows you to explore your internal world bringing a variety of physical, psychological and spiritual benefits. We spend the majority of our day and our life looking outside, so this is an opportunity to explore what’s inside all of us.
  • Origin. Meditation is not “New Age.” It has been practiced for over 5,000 years (references to it are found in old Indian texts). The practice of meditation has been found in many major religions, so you do not have to belong to a certain religious tradition to practice it. Nowadays, meditation, similar to yoga, is becoming increasingly popular in the Western world as a way to reduce stress.
  • How does meditation work? Major universities are studying the connection between meditation and brain activity. There are some interesting findings. For example, researchers at the University of Wisconsin found that meditators (experienced and novice) showed increases in electrical activity in the left frontal part of the brain, which is associated with emotional well-being. Researchers at Harvard University found that cortical regions of the brain related to attention & sensory processing were thicker in meditators vs. non-meditators. We know that as we age the cortical part of the brain becomes thinner, so it is possible that meditation may offset cortical thinning due to aging. The good news is that the changes in the brain activity are present even outside meditation, so they can help you throughout the day.
  • Benefits. Research findings that support the benefits of meditation are growing (more than 1,500 studies on PubMed). Interestingly, this research only confirms what sages and riches knew through their actual experience of this technique thousands of years ago.
  • o Meditation has been widely used as the antidote to stress.
    o It helps to decrease blood pressure, reduce production of stress hormones, improve digestion and sleep.
    o You may also experience a better mood, better relationships and an ability to change your habits a little easier (you just become much more aware of them).
    o At the spiritual level, meditation gives an opportunity to ask yourself some fundamental questions that we rarely ask ourselves: Who am I? What is my purpose?
  • Barriers. Often people try meditation and quit because they experience one the of following:
    o “I cannot stop thinking.” We are human beings and we are supposed to think due to the nature of our nervous system. Meditation is not about stopping your thoughts. In fact, the more you try to stop them, the more persistent they will become. Instead, try to observe your thoughts, and accept them to be part of you. Sometimes, you will have quiet meditations and other times, they will be a little more active. Your body and mind know what they need, so they will gratefully use the time you provide to unwind and decompress. I think about meditation as a way to defragment my mind (similar to a computer): let go of thoughts that are not nourishing and keep what seems to be helpful.
    o “I don’t have enough time.” You can start with only 10 minutes a day, and you may find some benefits. Thirty minutes of meditation equate to 1 hour of sleep, so you can potentially get up a little earlier, meditate and feel more rested than you would if you just slept in.
    o “I must sit in a lotus position and shave my head.” It may be your choice, but you don’t have to do it. I cannot sit in a lotus position and the most important part is to be comfortable. Haircut is entirely up to you.
    o “I need to mediate for years before I will see any benefits.” New meditators and those around them notice changes within weeks of regular meditation.
  • Ready to try? Here is a very simple meditation that you can do anywhere and it costs absolutely nothing:
    o Sit down and make sure you are comfortable. If you want, you can light a candle or incense that you like.
    o Close your eyes.
    o Inhale for a count of five, exhale for a count of 5… and repeat it 5 or more times.
    o Notice your breath. See if you can notice your next inhale and your exhale. Keep attention on your breath.
    o Your thoughts will start coming up; as you notice them, gently go back to your breath. So, the meditation will be the flow between your thoughts and breathing.
    o You can start with 10 minutes and you increase it to 30 minutes. Ideally, you would do it in the morning to prepare you for the day and in the evening (before dinner) to help you relax and process the day. But, do what you can!
  • If you want a little more help, consider getting a certified instructor to teach you. See if you can find one in your area. If you are in Charlotte, NC, I will be happy to help. Email me at mshafiro@choprateachers.com

November 11, 2009

Finding Balance Through Imbalance

A big WELCOME to Dana who is guest writing for us today! She shares her thoughts and insights about finding balance, and as a work-at-home mom with a young son, she has a lot of experience. We are excited to have her with us today, and look forward to learning more from her in the future.

Photo by Anywayzzz

While I was desperately trying to find time to write this piece last month, it occurred to me that I did not appear to be a poster child for balance. In fact, my life probably looked pretty out of whack. By the end of the month, I was exhausted, my house was a wreck, my to-do list was running off the page, and I was behind on my work.

Every weekend in October saw me rushing around, hurriedly preparing for and entertaining houseguests – cleaning, planning a menu, stocking the pantry, cooking homemade meals, arranging for interesting outings, and so on. The parade of visitors meant little downtime to recharge or take care of mundane but necessary life tasks that seem only to accumulate. Further, I work from home while caring for my young son, and I often work on the weekends. With the weekends consumed by family and friends, I found myself working nights and still getting behind both on sleep and my assignments. I nevertheless stubbornly refused to put down my book before bed or to give up my 5 a.m. run in the interest of getting sufficient rest.

None of that seems very balanced, and yet I would argue that periods of imbalance are necessary to achieving balance overall in our lives. Balance is not a state you reach and maintain – it is a dynamic and ongoing process. Sometimes temporary imbalances are necessary to promoting balance across time. Being out of balance can also illustrate for us where we need to make changes in order to promote long-term wellbeing. It’s a matter of knowing your priorities and making day to day decisions that are aligned with your big-picture goals. It also means keeping a positive attitude when you have to make tradeoffs. The key to balance – to everything, it sometimes seems – is in awareness. In knowing what is important to you, and in being present enough in your moments to chose actions that support those things, even when the choice paradoxically promotes temporary imbalance.

As a family, it is important to us to spend time with our loved ones. Though realizing that priority meant last month was a bit hectic, in the grand scheme of things, accepting a little craziness allowed us to see the people we care about the most – which is far more important than tackling a few chores or scratching off a couple of tasks on a never-ending to-do list. I also highly value the little bit of “me time” that I get these days. In the short term I was willing to sacrifice a few hours of sleep to ensure I got that time. I have learned the hard way that I am more recharged by some discretionary time than I am by an extra hour of sleep. I also knew that this period of imbalance would end, and I would find myself caught up on work and sleep and missing the hubbub of a house full of friends and family, which helped me stay positive when I was tired or feeling overwhelmed.

As a work-at-home mom, the need to constantly balance two of my life roles is ever-present. It can be overwhelming at times to try to focus on the needs of a toddler when I can hear my work line ringing or see an email that seems to require an immediate response. This physical juxtaposition of work and family makes salient to me the universal need to be present in the moment so that you can make an intuitive judgment about which activity is truly important or urgent and should therefore take priority. Sometimes it will be work, and sometimes it will be the baby – sometimes it will be sleep, other times the morning run. Maybe for others it means sacrificing a vacation day to pursue volunteer work, or turning down a job transfer to be closer to an aging parent. Balance doesn’t mean equal time spent in our different roles or activities – it means allocating our resources in a way that makes us happier, better people.

Engaging in this ongoing balancing act requires awareness – not just in the moment, but in how those moments accumulate. At the end of the day, week, or month, what did you prioritize most often? Were those choices in alignment with your big-picture priorities and goals? If not, what can you do differently next time?

November 6, 2009

More Balance

We are excited to welcome guest writer, David, back again! A dedicated consultant, family man, and friend, he faces many challenges in balancing it all, but strives to find time to enjoy these various aspects of his life. He is a man of many hobbies, in addition to his work and family roles, and is an avid sportsman with archery hunting and fly-fishing being his favorites. We are thrilled to read more about David’s perspective on :simple:balance:.

Photo by Camp ASCCA

As we move from a season of haunts and haints to a season of thanksgiving, I wonder if I am blessed with a more balanced life than I perceive. Do I take note of and cherish the opportunities that I have to engage in what I enjoy? Do I feel and express gratitude for those experiences enough? Am I so focused on feeling overwhelmed or burdened with my various life roles and responsibilities that I forget why I made them a part of my life to start with?

I ask myself these questions, sort of, as a self-test. I am afraid that there are many situations in which I have time with my family, but I don't soak it up like I should. And then I complain that I don’t have enough quality time with my loved ones. I am afraid that the time I have to myself is spent trying to do as much as possible instead of just enjoying my surroundings and taking a break from "the grind." And then my focus is on how little me-time I believe I have. I am afraid that I have more balance in my life than I give it credit for.

I think we all may find that our lives are more balanced than we realize if we just take the time to focus on what we are doing in the present moment and do it with vigor and passion. I have learned that an important aspect of feeling balanced is based on how I perceive my life. If I am more aware of the blessings I have, the quality of my relationships and work, and the value I place on all of these things, I am sure to feel more balance. On the reverse side, though, if my attention is on how little time I have, how stressed I feel, or all of the things I am missing out on, I will feel less balanced.

This Thanksgiving season I intend on doing my job with extra focus, absorbing every moment with my wife, daughter, and family, making my extracurricular activities a ton of FUN, and just living a healthy lifestyle. I think I am obligated to all of these things because I have truly been blessed in so many ways. How about you? How can you change your perceptions in order to find more balance?

November 3, 2009

Organic Produce Storage Tips

As we've covered here before at :simple:balance:, one key to finding balance is through what we put into our bodies - our food and nutrition. Most experts recommend that we eat organic food whenever possible to maximize vitamins and nutrients and minimize toxic chemicals. Because organic food can be more expensive than non-organic, it is important to ensure that we get the most out of our money and our food - both important for feeling balanced! Aundrea Tucker is back with us today to share some of her ideas about how to make our organic produce last longer.





Photo by Imapix

Did you know that if placed in the refrigerator while firm kiwifruit will last up to six months?!

Want to ripen your pears? Place them in a plastic bag with a couple of ripe bananas. Bananas give off ethylene gas, which ripens other fruit.

Don’t you hate it when you when you buy all the right foods, but it goes all wrong when you’re unable to eat them before they go bad? Here are some tips to keep your organic produce ready to eat for as long as possible.

APPLES
Apples ripen quickly at room temperature; ten times as fast as an apple kept at 32* Fahrenheit. Store apples in a plastic bag in the refrigerator away from strong odored foods such as cabbage or onions to prevent flavor transfer.

BANANAS
Do not refrigerate bananas until they are ripe. When you put them into the refrigerator they will turn black, but the insides will ripen slower. To ripen green bananas, put them into a plastic bag, seal it and place the bag in a warm place like on top of your refrigerator. This will cause the bananas to heat up which speeds the ripening process.

GRAPES
Grapes are harvested only when fully ripe. Before storing, remove any spoiled grapes with broken skins or browning from the bunch and keep refrigerated; they should keep up to a week. During storage, continue to remove any and all spoiled fruit. Grapes can also be frozen, extending their storage life up to three months.

KIWI
Very firm kiwifruit can be kept in the refrigerator for up to 6 months. Kiwifruit won't keep for nearly as long in the refrigerator after it begins to ripen. To ripen firm kiwis, leave them at room temperature, but away from heat or direct sunlight, for a few days to a week. Hasten ripening by placing them in a paper bag with an apple, pear, or banana. Once a kiwi fruit is ripe, however, store it far from other fruits, as it is very sensitive to the ethylene gas they emit, and tends to overripe even in the refrigerator. Ripe kiwis should keep for about one to two weeks.

MANGO
Leave under ripe mangoes at cool room temperature for a few days to soften and sweeten--very warm temperatures can cause an off-flavor to develop. Place two mangoes in a paper bag to speed ripening (or, if you don't have two mangoes, put another fruit such as an apple or banana in with the mango). Ripe mangoes will keep for two to three days in the refrigerator.

MELON
Whole ripe or cut melons can be stored in the refrigerator for about three days. Cut melons should be wrapped tightly in plastic. Leave the seeds inside a cut melon until you're ready to eat it to help keep the melon moist.

PEARS
Ripen pears at room temperature in a sealed plastic bag with a couple of ripe bananas. When the pear is ripe, refrigerate until you are ready to eat it. Product that is extremely hard will ripen best at room temperature.

ORANGES
Store oranges in a cool place outside the refrigerator and try to eat them within a few days. If you need to keep them longer, refrigerate in a plastic bag or in the vegetable crisper section of the refrigerator.

STRAWBERRIES
Strawberries are extremely perishable and should be refrigerated immediately. Store unwashed strawberries in the refrigerator by stacking them on paper towels (between the layers as well), in a moisture-proof container. Eat them within 48-72 hours, or freeze them.

BROCCOLI
Store broccoli in the high-humidity vegetable crisper of your refrigerator for up to three days. Refresh broccoli in ice water to maintain its bright green color if you're not using it right away or are making a cold presentation.

CABBAGE
Head cabbage stored in a plastic bag in the refrigerator's humid vegetable bin will last at least a week. Savoy and Napa cabbages should be consumed within three or four days.

CARROTS w/TOPS
Before storing carrots, remove their green tops, rinse, drain, and put the carrots in plastic bags and store them in the coldest part of the refrigerator with the highest humidity. They'll last several months this way.

CAULIFLOWER
Cauliflower should be placed in a plastic bag and stored in your refrigerator crisper. When stored properly, cauliflower will last up to five days; however, it is best when eaten within three days.

CELERY
To store celery, trim the base and remove any leaves or ribs that are damaged or bruised. Rinse, place in a plastic bag, and keep in the refrigerator's humid vegetable bin, and it will last about two weeks.

CHARD
Refrigerate in plastic wrap up to 2 days. Rainbow Chard is pretty colorful Chard with yellow, pink, orange, white, and red veins.

COLLARDS
Wrap unwashed greens in damp paper towels. Refrigerate in a plastic bag, in the crisper, up to 5 days.

CORN
Corn is best eaten immediately. However, it can be stored in the refrigerator for a few days in plastic bags with the husk still on.

GREEN BEANS
Place green beans in a perforated plastic bag or paper bag and store them in the refrigerator crisper for up to five days.

LETTUCE
Refrigerate unwashed leaves in a plastic bag in the vegetable drawer. A plastic bag from the grocery store is sufficient. Lettuce will keep for up to 5 days. Do not store lettuce with melons, apples, pears, or other ethylene gas-emitting fruits as they will cause the lettuce to turn brown.

ONIONS
Store onions in a dry, dark, well-ventilated place; not in the refrigerator.

PEPPERS
They can be stored for at least a week if placed in a plastic bag and kept in the refrigerator. The riper the pepper is when harvested, the less time it will maintain its freshness.

POTATOES
Potatoes like cool (45* F to 50* F) humid (but not wet) surroundings, but refrigeration can turn the starch in the potatoes to sugar and may tend to darken them when cooked.

SPINACH
When you get bunched spinach home, untie it, remove any blemished leaves, trim off the stems, and wash it thoroughly in cold water. Repeat if necessary until you're sure all the grit is gone. Spin dry in a salad spinner or drain well, then put into clean plastic bags very loosely wrapped with paper towels. It will last only two to three days, so plan on eating your rinsed spinach right away. Cold, moist surroundings, as low as 32*F and about 95% humidity are the best for storing spinach.

SUMMER SQUASH
Place in a plastic bag and refrigerate for 3-5 days.

WINTER HARD SQUASHES
Butternut, Acorn, Spaghetti Store squash in a cool, preferably dark, well-ventilated area for up to one month. Wrap cut pieces in plastic and refrigerate up to five days.

TOMATOES
Keep tomatoes at room temperature until ripened. Once ripened, tomatoes will last for two to three days. If necessary, tomatoes can be refrigerated in vegetable bin for approximately one week. Try to avoid refrigerating tomatoes whenever possible. Tomatoes will lose their flavor once stored below 55.